God?

I had the pleasure of having lunch with a close friend yesterday. We talked about God. She told me that what bothered her most were people who abdicate their responsibility and accountability in the name of God. She explained that when some of her friends accomplish something, they don't take credit but give it all to God - as a third party not truly integrated with them. When something fails, they also blame God. When they are less that who they can be, they blame God for not supporting them. When they are at their best, they credit God for leading them along the right path.

She also told me that when she is faced with a deep dilemma, she looks inside for guidance and answers. When she does so, she pictures her support network and thinks about the lessons they tried to give and the values they have transferred to her. She sees support from them as well as those who love her (her parents, her sister, cousins, special friends, etc.). She is happy to share the credit and blame with them, but she also says that she is ultimately responsible for the choices she makes and the decisions at which she arrives. She also talked about a scene from the last Harry Potter book where Harry calls upon his family, most of whom are dead, by using some special magic thing he has found. He calls upon them for help and guidance, for support and strength, for the loving energy he needs to accomplish a goal he has set for himself. She said that this was similar to how she looks inside herself to find answers.

I am so glad I listened more fully yesterday and was able to hear her. I shared that I still don't see what she related as being far from my understanding of God. Perhaps she limits this picture to her family and special friends, but I think of a wider sense of support. I think the first time someone shared the meaning of "Namaste" with me, it really clarified my developing understanding of God. The idea that "the divinity in me greets the divinity in you" helped me see God as an integral part of me that is there whether I recognize/acknowledge it or not. God is that divine energy in me that allows me, encourages me, sometimes even drives me to be the best I can be. God is the commonality among all those people my daughter pictures when she looks inside. It is when we are at our best that we provide the strength and guidance that she needs. It is God that helped us do that - not as a way for me to abdicate credit for this, but as a way to acknowledge that I am not alone in all of this. I love it and am proud of myself whenever I am able to accomplish my best. Thanking God is not a minimizing of this, but a celebration.

We also talked about how God and religion are not the same thing. Though religion is supposed to help us reconnect with the divinity that is part of us, it often falls short of that goal. When my friend told me about various incidents that distanced her continually from believing in God, she really related incidents of where religion failed to reconnect but actually increased the distance between her and a relationship with the divinity that is her. Most of these incidents were very hurtful - either to her or to someone for whom she cares deeply. She saw some of these as situations that COULD have been affirming and strengthening for friends, but wound up being situations where her friends became more dependent (or co-dependent) and less assertive.

How do we get the message out that God is not some third party judge that sits on a big marble throne in Washington DC and watches us and plays little games with us? I acknowledge that I once saw God this way. However, that was a long time ago. I would think it is time for us to grow up - even as children - to realize that this image of God might well have served a society that needed an external locus of control to get it to be accountable for everyone.

I want our society to grow up. I want us to realize that we have it within us to love and care for the entire creation and that we have the power to heal the earth, people, and all the rest of nature. For me, it is God that makes this all possible. Am I clear for anyone who reads this or is it still all completely fuzzy?

A funny thing happened @ Starbucks

So I stopped at Starbucks to feed my caffeine addiction yesterday and to generally relax and appreciate the movement of the day and our planet. As I was doing so, someone sitting nearby (a young woman of university age) asked if I would mind discussing something with her as she was preparing for a debate. I'm usually open to that sort of thing. She explained that she was debating the concept of marriage for a university class. She would be taking the standpoint that governments should stay out of the process of regulating marriage. She wanted to know why I had married, what I thought about the institution of marriage, what would I consider as "grounds for divorce," and anything else I wanted to comment. The conversation eventually led to same sex marriage. I explained that I worked at a church that supported the inclusion of everyone in our community - this inclusion also involved sacraments. We certainly did perform legal marriages for same sex couples and we previously had performed same sex covenanting ceremonies for those who wanted to marry spiritually prior to marriage becoming a legal possibility.

It turn out that her college is closely allied with the Alliance Church. She was interested in the idea of full membership of gay & lesbian people, would promote that her church welcomes everyone, but that she would not support the idea of same sex marriage. When I asked if this was a bit conflicting with "welcoming", she went into the "love the sinner, but not the sin" shtick. When I asked about the "sin" aspect, she quoted Paul rather than Leviticus. Apparently the absence of mention of same sex couples makes any joining of such a sin.

As we neared the end of our conversation together, I explained that I think the Bible is rich with symbolism, that it was written so long ago that I try to look deeply inside to understand how the writings can useful in today's world. I told her that I try to go back and compare and contrast my understanding of Christ's message to us with the writings in the Bible. I explained that I truly believe that our make up is part of the miracle that has been created in our existence and that if God truly had such a strong influence on this creation, I can't believe that being Gay or Lesbian could be a sin - nor the love making between adults - whether they be Gay, Lesbian, Straight, trans-gendered, trans-sexual, or whatever. It seemed that she quickly went into an "auto-pilot" kind of reaction that retreated to the "security" of the church, her family, or doctrine. There seemed to be a stop to her own thinking. It was too bad. Things had been interesting up to that point.

I wonder if I do that when I get to a point in discussion where I no longer am sure of myself. I truly hope not. I think it is really ok to try to form a new understanding of an idea. I want my beliefs to be able to withstand close examination. I am ok with the idea that someone may be able to help me understand something in a deeper way.

What think you?