Privilege

It is amazing how one's context can really change the way one views the world. I have always thought that I was somewhat aware of the world around me and the privilege as well as the suffering that exists. However, in my new position, here at the church, I am so much more aware of the privilege I experience and the suffering that is ever present.

My morning was spent trying to organize stuff for the up-coming move into our new condo. We moved out of our house at the end of August. We have been living at our "weekend" place in Dead Man's Flats since then. It is a small condo with two bedrooms and has been our refuge for the last several years. It is 100 km from there to work and we have been doing the trip most days since the end of August. We occasionally stay in the city with a friend who is renting a place while her house is being built. For the past week, we have stayed at her house taking care of her dogs while she was away. It has been frigidly cold for the past week and the roads have been in rough shape outside the city. So, it has been a relief to be able to stay in the city and not make the 200km trip each day.

How many people don't have a place to stay? How many people have to worry about staying warm enough to make it through to the next morning? How many have no choice as to whether they will have a long commute or not? How many have no options? It amazes me that these numbers are large.

As I was driving around the city trying to get things organized, realize that I have a vehicle to drive. Not only that, I have a choice of vehicle. I don't have to try to ride the bus to the airport to pickup a delivery that was not made to the correct address. I don't have to rely on the generosity of others. I do not have to argue with shipping companies about deliveries because I have no option to drive to collect my package.

These are local issues. As I was driving, I listened to some commentary on Darfur. The murder and execution of individuals in Darfur has been going on for many years. Likely, the governments of developed countries could assist in resolving the issues if there was the political and social will. However, Darfur doesn't seem to have anything we want to plunder in order for us to have such a will.

I complain because I want the renovations to be done more quickly. I want to move in and get organized before Christmas. There are people in Darfur, in Canada, in Calgary, and in my neighbourhood who complain because they don't know whether they will live from now until the 25th of December.

What's that about?

Tree Decorating

I thought I'd share a few photos of the tree decorating last Friday. We do two different trees each year. It becomes quite a fun social event.


































I am told this was one of the more "calm" tree decoratings. I can tell I'm getting old. I have a hard time finding anything "calm," about it. It was fun, but hardly "calm."
I

Sanctuary@Knox

I continue to be excited about the possibilities that are created with this new project. We are aiming our efforts at a group that is not served by any other agency. Though some of the participants may have been involved in other programs, or continue to be involved in other programs, we will be offering the unique one-on-one support for their continued learning. We want to provide opportunities for those individuals between the ages of 16 and 25 to improve their learning skills and pursue any learning they want to pursue with the support of experienced teachers and learners. Where participants have been involved with other programs, we will liaise with them to gather any information they have on learning styles, learning difficulties, strengths, abilities, etc. If they have had various learning assessments, we can use that information to further support our work with them. Where they haven't, we will either do our own informal assessments, or use standardized assessment tools to discover what we need to know to best support the learning.

The pilot will have our learning centre open for three days a week, from 8:30 AM to 4:30 PM. It will have a minimum of one volunteer present for all those hours. The volunteer assists participants in learning whatever they want to learn. In some cases, it will mean only that the participant will have someone there if they have questions or to rely on for support. In other cases, we will help individuals to clarify what they want to learn and work with them to establish a plan for learning.

We will have access to various assistive technologies:

• speech-to-text software
• text to speech software
• on-screen dictionaries
• rebus composition software
• up to date Office Suite
• graphic organizers
• presentation software
• internet access
  

and others.

The research behind this project comes from my own doctoral studies exploring how various technologies support literacy development in 1st and 2nd languages. We discovered that technology has developed to a point where it can be used as a tool for those who have difficulties with one particular style of learning to easily access other forms of expression. For the non-reader, this means that they can access information, process it, learn from it, and use it to share with others from their own particular point of view. Traditionally, schools have operated out of necessity using mainly print-based information sources. Assistive technologies allow the non-reader to access information from print-based sources. However, we also honour individual strengths in other media and encourage individuals to get information from whatever sources they find and to use it. They can also use various media as an expressive or sharing format. I can provide anyone with many more details and more information if one wants it. I know that this is my passion, so I tend to go off the deep end.

We plan to set up our own network so that there is no potential hazard to the church's network and server. We will have our own server as well.

Unfortunately, there are costs to the upgrades. We need approximately $6,000.00 to upgrade the memory of the computers, establish the network, and buy the software.

If anyone reading this wishes to make a contribution to the Snactuary@Knox project, they can do so by sending a cheque payable to "Knox United Church" to:

Sanctuary@Knox
506 Fourth Street S. W.
Calgary, Alberta
T2P 1S7

If you mark "Sanctuary@Knox" on the memo part of the cheque, it will go into the designated fund and receive a charitable donation tax receipt.

Advent Begins

Even though we have yet to arrive to December, Advent has begun with a flourish! I wish that all flourishes were lovely, but some are not.

The trees go up in the sanctuary today. They get decorated tomorrow evening. Most of the bulletins for December are already printed - they would all be printed if it weren't for me - I seem to be a hurdle. The sanctuary itself has been decorated with wreaths and poinsettias. Advent candle wreath has been unearthed and set up - minus the Christ candle, but someone has taken responsibility to find it and/or get a new one. And I am finding out that there are fewer differences between working in a school and working in a church than I first imagined. Nerves get just as fraught in a church as they do in a school - even without report cards.

As well, the literacy project was approved at the board meeting last week. I am trying to raise $6,000.00 for the software and hardware upgrades; find a source for lunches; get pamphlets designed, printed, and distributed; and generally get organized to be open for the beginning of January.

We do have a name. "Sanctuary@Knox" is what we're calling it. I am hoping that it appeals to those who will eventually come. I'm trying to emphasize the safe aspect of the program as well as acknowledging that we are a church. It also hints that we are a technology rich learning environment. I am pumped, but I am also finding that the details can get a bit cumbersome. All part of the work. The good part of that is the support from the board and many individual members of this community. I helps me get through the maze of technicalities as well as over the hurdles.

There is also a feeling of wonder that this is happening at the same time as we begin a liturgical year. I think I am going to find increasingly that there is meaning in that.

Labyrinth Walks

Last Friday, a group of kids came from another church here in Calgary to find out about the Labyrinth. Coincidentally, a student from a local college was visiting that afternoon and was seeking more information about the Labyrinth. She asked if she could joins us for the evening walk. She brought along three friends.

Most of the time, when I have walked the Labyrinth, the group has been small. This time, the group was fairly big. As well, I have never been the "leader" when I have done this before. Most of the time, actually, I have walked the labyrinth by myself. I usually am using this walk as a way to calm myself and try to focus inward to find the answers to whatever dilemma I face at the time.

It was really interesting to do this Friday evening. I don't know for sure what kind of experience I expected, but it certainly was not what actually occurred. Perhaps, I was skeptical of whether these kids would find the spirituality in the walk. They certainly did. As well, I was uncertain about the college students and their skepticism. There was none. They were obviously finding this a completely different, but significant experience.

Afterwards, I took them into the sanctuary for debriefing. There was not a lot of discussion, but they were fascinated with the entire building. They felt the different energies of the two rooms (the sanctuary and the labyrinth room). They were fascinated with the organ, the size of the room, the age of the building.

I truly enjoyed the time with them and am now trying to figure out how I can bring our own youth to have a similar experience.

Inclusion

Yesterday's study group centred on the idea that "God is here for everyone." We began by watching an advertising campaign that was initiated by the United Church of Christ (in the U. S.) a couple of years ago. Apparently, the major networks, other than ABC, would not run the ads. They thought they were too controversial. They seem somewhat tame to me.

The first one they produced was one entitled "Steeple." They showed it awhile and then did some research on its. It apparently did not do much for anyone other than those who were already church goers. They then produced one they refer to as "Bouncer." This one appealed to a small group outside of "church goers," but not significantly so. They finally produced the one they refer to as "ejector." This one apparently widened the reception and made an impact on most viewers. It is amazing to me that one has to be so blatant to get a message across. A lesson in communication. (You can see all three by clicking on the title of this posting.)

I have been struggling with trying to find music that will appeal to youths. I have written about this previously. When I find good music that has meaningful lyrics, I try to match it directly to the message of the sermon and the readings of the day. Unfortunately, there are some members who find the music "uncomfortable." They want to keep that warm glow - somewhat soporific in nature - until the end of the service. This music tends to interrupt that feeling. They want me to stop.

I plan on stopping for advent. However, I need to find a way to communicate how our services, as they run now, do NOT include children and youth. We have modified how we leave and introduced re-entry into the congregation at the end of the service.

What used to happen in the service was quite different. We would begin the service with call to order, hymns, and the readings. Then the minister would get up and do "Children's Time." Then the children would leave - never to return until the next week. I loved the stories. I loved that "Children's" time. For me, it was an intro to what the sermon would be like. The stories were cute, poignant, and often gave us an glimpse of the ministers' childhood and sense of humour. It appealed to ma as an adult. It wasn't doing much for the kids. It also bothered me that the kids never re-appeared. I felt we were giving them the message: "We can tolerate you for a little time, but that's about it. We don't have much of a place for you here, so go along and we'll see you next week."

I don't, for a moment, believe that the congregation meant to communicate this message. I just felt strongly that it was being communicated. So one of the first things I asked to modify was when we left.

We try to leave as soon as possible during the service. We usually leave during the first hymn. If there is a baptism, we leave after the baptism - the children need to be there. (The children help bless the new members, they are reminded of their own baptism and what that means, and they present candles to the parents and generally welcome the new members into the church community.) If there is a special presentation (as there was on Remembrance Day), we stay for the presentation and then leave. Once we are gathered in our place within the church (a room adjacent to the sanctuary), I summarize or paraphrase the readings for the day and lead a discussion about what it might mean to the kids. It is interesting to do, as my group ranges from age 4 - 16. Sometimes the discussion is heated, sometimes contradictory, sometimes amazingly spiritual, and always interesting. There has never been a day when the discussion went flat.

I usually ask the participants to think of a way to respond to the readings and the discussion. They each have a journal into which they can draw, write, colour, or whatever. I am surprised at how many of the older children choose to draw.

All the while, I am listening for the section of the service when we go back into the congregation. It is towards the end, after the "prayers of the people," and before the "community news." This is when I usually play the music selection for the week. We walk back into the sanctuary and we share what we (I use "we" to represent both myself and the children) have discussed. Sometimes this is a sharing of the drawings, a short skit, a dance, or me talking. The participants help me decide what form the sharing will be. We finish the community news occurs.

I hope that this symbolically represents to the rest of the congregation that we are also important members of the community. That we understand what is being discussed as well as they do - perhaps on a different level, but we understand. There are times when I think the children understand better than we adults do. For them it comes so quickly.

The music I play never runs over a complete minute. Most of the time it is 30 seconds of music. One time, I played the entire piece because it was more "folky" and there were no electric guitars or heavy metal sounds. All the same, there were complaints. Unfortunately, never to me directly. If they came directly, I could at least enter into discussion about the music. With the messages always being relayed, I never get the opportunity.

I guess the other aspect that bothers me about this is the idea of "comfort." If we truly mean that everyone is welcome, we are going to be welcoming people that might make us "uncomfortable." If I am successful in getting youths to come here to learn, I am hoping that they may also decide to check us out on Sundays and see if our services say anything to them. They will make people "uncomfortable." They will not come in pristine dresses and suits. They will not likely be neatly groomed and smelling of good cologne. They may have tattoos, piercings, leather garments, dirty faces, etc. How will they be received? I don't want to expose these individuals to further alienation. They get enough of it.

We have come to welcome all sexual orientations. We do not act in ageist ways that negate the value of the elder members of the community. We try increasingly more diligently to honour all sexes, socio-economic groups, all marital or coupling statuses, and all cultural groups. Will we be able to accept youth as they are?

Justice

Big surprise, but I am involved in a Bible Study with a group of people from church. They are an amazing group. Many of them are older than I and only a couple are younger. What I find is that some of the broadest thinkers are the ones who are older. They destroy my stereotypes! (Darn it!)

Last week we centred our study on Justice as it is represented in the Bible and as it plays a role within the United Church of Canada. I had not realized that the United Church of Canada was actually formed out of this sense that churches must do more than be hearers of the Word, but doers of the Word. I had some vague assumption that it was formed as was the United Church of Christ, in the states - more as a means of joining together of like-minded; but also for convenience. That may be unfair to say that "convenience" had anything to do with it; but growing up in the church felt like convenience was a big part.

In Canada, the like-mindedness focussed on the Justice aspect of our faith. I feel proud to part of that. However, what do we do? Are our actions enough? Are they effective? Where do we focus?

I found last week overwhelming once I started filtering my world through the lens of Justice. There is so much in the world that is unjust. What can I do about it? Where do I begin. Is it adequate to act locally and do what I can within my realm, or do I need to be involved in global justice issues? What if my "solutions" are not the best? When I act locally, I am able to ensure that I stay open-ended - that I don't impose my solution or "fix" on a situation. An example of this would be my planned project for literacy and youth. I am committed to the idea that each participant come with their own goal and that I do not try to impose my value upon their goals. If an individual wants assistance in clarifying his/her goal(s), I am happy to support a process that will do so. However, it still is not my place to impose my learning goals upon them.

In our study session this morning, we looked briefly at the situation in Darfur. One person related how we, as a nation, are capable of providing a solution to what is occurring by offering to take in all those who are suffering and bring them to Canada. My first reaction was to question whether this was the right solution. What makes us think that anyone would want to leave their own land to come to ours? At the same time, the situation is so critical that people might go for anything that got them out of there. The discussion continued by acknowledgeing that we don't possess the collective will to bring everyone here at the great expense and that there would be a huge outcry at the costs while we would likely be able to finance it by simply leaving the GST at the present level or return it to the level it was a year ago.

I admire the thinking of this person to consider that the nation is capable of providing a solution. However, I think we are being over simplistic to think that this might be a desirable or best solution. Are we not simply providing a band aid solution? What are we going to do to provide education so that people can make a living here? What will we do to guarantee that housing is available? How will we assist that many people to become acclimated to our climate and society? I think it sounded so similar to what our government has done with Inuit and other aboriginal peoples in the past that has resulted in huge crises.

On the other hand, am I simply coming up with reasons for avoiding such a change to our social fabric? Bringing in a million individuals from any one culture would drastically change what is presently here. Am I trying to protect that against the concept of being just?

If expend energy on my local project, I have more immediate potential of redirecting strategies when they prove to be less than successful. I can do on-going assessment to ensure that the participants are learning needed skills. I can provide long-term support for the individuals who desire or need it.

I am confident that the individual in our group who suggested the solution presented has the very best of intentions. I don't for a moment believe that there is any other reason than to provide a potential solution to a heart-breaking world problem. I just wonder how we can ensure that we could redirect or modify the plan to promote success in an on-going nature once we moved close to a million people half-way around the world to a completely different society and climate. Or am I making excuses again?

So who am I to wonder?

A Post Script

Wow, I hadn't realized how many pages were really missing. Now I "know" even less!

Knowing

I find it interesting to ponder different expressions. The one that intrigues me today is the whole idea of "Knowing." What do we really mean when we say "I know?"

Why is this coming up? I think it has to do with me not being able to find this current blog. I wonder why I can't find it. Is it because what I wrote what might be seen as something too personal? Could it be a simple question of not closing out properly last time? I really have no way of "knowing."

I thought if I came here and tried a new post, and it worked, I might have more information about the page. However, what would I really "know?" Only that this entry was posted. Not truly anything relating to the last one.

If this doesn't post, does it mean that the blog has been suspended? Perhaps it is something wrong with the address I have been using? Maybe the server upon which my page resides is having trouble? Perhaps the other blogs I've visited are simply on a different server. How will posting this make any difference in my understanding or "knowing" the true explanation.

And how does this all relate to spiritual development? There is a part of me that suspects it is deeply related. Another part tells me this is all "crap" and that I am just rambling in order to get to the end so I can post. Am I becoming schizophrenic before your very eyes?

Who "knows?"

More water to wine

Yesterday, we racked the wine (transferred it from one carboy to another), got it off the sludge that is created during fermentation, added some stuff to help stop any further fermentation, and added more stuff that will help trap any "floaties" and will fall to the bottom and create another layer of sludge.

It's all rather symbolic, no? As we do things in our lives to further our spiritual growth, we become aware of the "sludge" in our lives. All the behaviours that make us less than who we might be. When we become aware of that "sludge," we have a choice to either eliminate it from our lives, or let it stay. Children are marvelous in this. They simply decide to eliminate it. As an adult, I find it more difficult. Do I really want to change who I am?

I used to complain that "born-again" Christians all seemed to come back as themselves, with very little change that I could see. They just quoted a lot of scripture, but seemed to lead the same debauched lives that they lead before being "born-again."

I see this process as an opportunity for me to be something different. As I identify the parts of my life that distance me from being the best I can be, I want to either modify those parts to allow my deeper spirituality or eliminate them. In doing so, my life as I have lived it previously must change. So what happens to my social network? What happens to my relationships with family and close friends? What happens to my primary relationship(s)? What happens to my goals? What happens to my previous plans for the future?

It is fascinating that some people see faith as a way to simplify their lives. They look to their religions for simple answers. I see that my faith journey is leading me through more complex questions and explorations. This seems like the opposite!

And, please let me be clear. I would have it no other way. I don't want my faith community to be easy. I want it to help me grow. I want it to be a place where the difficult questions can be examined. I want my faith community to be a place where I can live my beliefs.

Taoism

A friend of mine, who is now dead, was a great source of expansion and nurture as far as my own spiritual development was concerned. He was the only person who seemed successful at getting me to understand Taoism and its gentle acceptance of the world and its rhythms.

Another friend sent me the story below. I received it today. I think it is a lovely story that illustrates this sense of understanding that life, God, the Universe, (or whatever various belief systems like to call it) gives us each gifts. Life is the first gift. What we come to understand as other gifts or challenges (or faults) are only values that we, as humans, put to our individual characteristics. Perhaps we need to see our "cracks" more as the gifts they truly are.

The Cracked Pot

An elderly woman had two large pots,
each hung on the ends of a pole which she carried across her neck.

One of the pots had a crack in it
while the other was perfect
and always delivered a full portion of water.

At the end of the long walks from the stream to the house,
the cracked pot arrived only half full.

For two years,
this went on daily,
with the woman bringing home
only one and a half pots of water.

Of course the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments.

But the poor cracked pot
was ashamed of its own imperfection,
and was miserable that it could only do half
of what it had been made
to do.

After two years
of what it perceived to be bitter failure,
it spoke to the woman one day by the stream.
"I am ashamed of myself
because this crack in my side causes
water to leak out all the way back
to
your house."

The old woman smiled,
"Did you notice that there are
flowers on your side of the path,
but not on the other pot's side?"

"That's because I have always known about your flaw
so I planted
flower seeds on your side of the path,
and every day while we walk back
you
water them."

"For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful
to decorate the table.

Without you being just the way you are,
there would not be this beauty to
grace the house."

Each of us has our
own unique "flaw."
But it's the cracks and flaws we have
that make our
lives together
so very interesting and rewarding.

Take each person for whom they are. Find the good in them.

Getting ready for Advent

I am used to planning ahead. After all, I have been a teacher for 34 years. Planning is crucial.

All the same, the more I know about children, teaching, real learning, and what makes learning passionate for those involved; the more I know that plans need to be flexible, fluid, and responsive to the needs of the group with whom one works.

So now I find myself in a church, working with children. There are truly interesting expectations regarding the work I do. One is Christmas Eve.

Years ago, when I was the chair of the "Worship Committee" (as it was then called), I was told that there was an expectation that the chair of the committee would work with one of the ministers to lead the early service. Now that I am Coordinator of Children & Youth, I am told that I am expected to work with one of the ministers to lead the early service. I sometimes wonder how much of this is linked to the position and how much is linked to the person.

At any rate, I am excited about the expectation, but I also know deep down that I need to keep this VERY fluid and flexible. Most of the children with whom I work have already told me that they won't be around for Christmas Eve. So planning to meet their needs is out the window. I need to plan for a big crowd of people who most likely don't come to this church very frequently. They will want to hear the traditional carols, but will also want to know that the church is staying current.

I think I'll write a story for the service. I hope that my counterpart will accept that.

Continuing Conversations

At church yesterday, I was speaking with someone who used to come regularly to church and has chosen to go elsewhere for a fairly long period of time. This particularly interests me as she was a younger member of our congregation. She explained to me that, though she is very attached to the liberal theology of our church, she finds it frustrating that no one seems to talk about God or Jesus except when they are in the sanctuary. Very few conversations occur after the service or in passing that have much to do with spirituality, beliefs, faith, or whatever.

So, of course, I want to see what might be done. I mentioned about this blog and that I was trying to use it to explore spirituality and talk about faith. I know that it is not always the topic at hand, but I try to keep that in mind whenever I post. All the same, this is not a "real time" conversation. So.....

I wondered about a continuing session, after the service, to further explore the topic of the Sunday service. If the Sunday service topic doesn't seem to drive it, then whatever one wanted to bring up. I could have coffee, tea, juice, etc. in the room and the room is designed to be comfortable and relaxing. I might be a way to continue exploration and nurture the need that was expressed.

Is there anyone else who might be interested? If you don't want to comment here, try my email: youth@knoxunited.ab.ca or dmoulton@knoxunited.ab.ca to express your interest or to ask questions.

Painful lessons

I've often said that some of the most important lessons I've ever learned haver been painful ones. Yesterday's lesson was one of them. I wonder when I will finally get it and that learning will come more gently.

I share information on this blog with a sense that no one reads it. It turns out that I am very wrong. Because someone doesn't comment, apparently doesn't mean that it hasn't been read. That is why I try to comment on anything I read on someone else's blog. I want them to know that I have visited, read, and thought about what they wrote.

I share openly forgetting, as well, to check out with others if it is alright to share what might have passed during conversations or situations in which we both participate. I have such a naive belief that when someone reads about these conversations, situations, or whatever, that they will see the same wonder that I do and learn similar lessons as I do. All the same, it is not up to me to share someone else's thoughts to the world at large without checking it out with them first.

So, For anyone who reads this or any of my ramblings on other blogs:
If I have offended you, hurt you, or betrayed a confidence, please accept my apologies and know that I will do everything I can in the future to ensure that I don't do it again. As well, I thank you for trusting me enough to share your pain, embarrassment or offense with me so that I can continue to learn. I am honoured that you can do that with me. I am humbled by your wisdom and care.

Continuous Learning

Just in case anyone ever thinks that they might stop learning, I'd like to suggest that you're never too old to learn something. More later!

In case you need some comic relief after reading the following two entries

Click on the title above and this will take you to a site where you can watch a short, but amusing video regarding some of our religious hang-ups.

Karla

When I shared my experiences with Karla on Sunday, I had no idea that I would be meeting someone whose family is going through similar trauma the next day. Yesterday, Kandace came to the church. She was obviously in a state of agitation and worry. She told me that her daughter, Susan, had just been taken into foster care and that she was going into treatment at the end of this week. She was walking by the church and felt driven to come in. She wanted to know if I would pray with her. Who could refuse a request like that? I ask anyone who is reading this to pray for both Kandace & Susan over the next while. They are in pain and their pain will not be subsiding for awhile. They both need as much light, comfort, support and love as God can provide. Let’s share ours with them. In their honour, I share my story of Karla:

There are so many people for whom Karla will remain vividly etched in their memories. Some of my first recollections of her are images of mildly disruptive behaviours in the classroom and more seriously disruptive behaviours in the lunchroom. Karla had been diagnosed ADHD in grade one, and I first met her in grade two. When Karla took her medication, she was pretty attentive and focused in class. By lunchtime, she would forget to take the noontime dose and would disrupt the lunchroom. This would remind US to give her the meds and the afternoon would go fairly well.

At the end of her second grade year, Karla transferred to another school. At the time, I had a conversation with her mother explaining that change was never an easy thing for ADHD kids. I stressed that Karla had pretty well stabilized and set some routines that were helping her, and that her mother would need to ensure that the same routines were established at the new school. Though I had spent more than average time with Karla and her parents, I had pretty well removed her from my consciousness by the beginning of October the next school year.

At the end of November, I received a phone call from a colleague who was the principal at Karla’s new school. She was calling as she had read the file, seen that Karla had experienced some success at our school, and wanted some advice. She then described a child with whom I had obviously never had any contact. The child she described crawled on the floor making animal sounds. This child threw things at her teacher, ran from authorities, swore in front of her classmates, destroyed anything she could get her hands on, and disrupted not only her classroom but the entire school.

Through a process that began that day, we discovered that both of Karla’s parents had developed serious drug issues. Not only were they using drugs purchased illegally on the street, they were using Karla’s ADHD medication, drinking excessively, and were mostly unconscious during Karla’s waking hours. At grade three, Karla was getting up by herself, preparing her own breakfast and lunch, preparing for school, showing up on-time EVERY DAY, and doing her homework every night. She was obviously absorbing what occurred during the classroom while she was there (in spite of her disruptive behaviour) – the only indication of this being the completed homework – mostly correct.

The process resulted in Karla’s father moving out and getting control of his substance abuse. Karla’s mother began a string of unsuccessful rehabilitative processes that took her away from home for weeks at a time. Karla wound up back with us, living with her grandmother, with grandma having legal custody of Karla and her well-being.

During this process, personnel from the two schools met with Karla, her family, and support personnel from the school board and social services. During these meetings, at which Karla never exhibited the behaviours that my colleague described, she apologized to people at her new school for her disruptions and helped plan for her re-entry to our school.

Upon her return, I wish I could say she stabilized and returned to her former behaviour pattern. However, that would be far from the truth. We were, however, able to re-establish our relationship with her and discover the depth of trauma that had occurred in the short time that she was away from us. We were able to connect her to many of the necessary support services she needed to start healing. She tested our relationships constantly and we were relentless in our consistency with her.

One particular example of this consistency regarded promises. I had told her early on in this journey that I would keep any promises I made to her. (Promises were often broken during her parents’ darkest period.) I told her that some promises were the kind she would be happy that I kept and that others would be ones that she would likely wish I broke. We had made an agreement that if she could keep adequate control of her behaviour for a fairly long period of time, remaining in class without disrupting her class, she would be welcome to participate in a special outdoor school program to which we had been invited. I also said that once she had done so, she would be going to the “camp” regardless of any behaviour that ensued after that period of time. However, if she was disruptive or made it impossible for others to learn in class, she would be removed from class and would have to go home for the rest of that day.

Karla was able to control her behaviour for three weeks in a row – the required time for the agreement. In fact, as I wanted to give her some wiggle room, we began this agreement six weeks prior to going to “camp.” She had fulfilled the agreement during the first three weeks. The first day after having fulfilled her obligation, she disrupted the class within the first hour of the day. I called her to the office to explain that one of her grandparents was on the way to pick her up and that she would be going home for the rest of the day. She began a temper tantrum that was amazingly energetic, foul, ear-piercing, and full of crocodile tears. She called me a liar and cursed me for breaking my promises. After she calmed down, I asked her which promises I had broken. She told me that I had promised her that she could go to camp and I was sending her home. I calmly reminded her that I had said nothing about camp in that day's incident. I affirmed that she had fulfilled her agreement about camp and that she was, indeed, going. I also reminded her that I had told her that if she disrupted class, she would be going home. These were separate agreements and one did not have any connection to the other. The only way she would jeopardize the camp agreement would be if she disrupted class on the day of departure and need to be sent home. However, as we were leaving before the beginning of classes that day, I doubted she would be able to sabotage that agreement. By the time that her grandparent had arrived, Karla was calm, went willingly, telling about how this was not going to affect her camp experience. “I fulfilled my agreement. I get to go!” During the following three weeks, Karla disrupted her class two more times, each time going home willingly.

Her mother continues to struggle with her own demons and Karla remains with her grandmother. On her last day of grade 6, she told her teachers and the school personnel that worked with her that she would miss us as we were like family members to her. She gave me a hug that day that I thought would never end.

Damien

So I promised the stories. What I can do here is include some of the details that were eliminated to ensure that we remained in the time frame given me for the service. Some of the details are changed so that the identity of the child is protected.

Damien was soon to be six when I first met him. I met him when his teacher called down to the office to ask me to come to her room because one of her children “was going wild,” standing in the middle of a round table, and kicking at anyone who came near to him. By the time I had arrived, the teacher had all the other children sitting quietly on the floor around her and she was reading a story to them. Damien, having no one near him, was no longer threatening anyone. He looked like he was in pain. While the teacher quietly read the story to the rest of the class, I slowly approached Damien and asked him if he was OK. He responded that he was and I asked him to come down from the table as I didn’t think it was a safe place for him. He told me that he was afraid that he would tip the table over and fall, so I told him that I would help him and catch him if he did fall. As he approached the edge of the table, it did begin to tip, he lost his balance and I caught him. I could feel his body stiffen at my touch so I immediately put him on the floor as safely and gently as I could. By now, the class was watching us, so I knelt down and whispered to him that I would like to talk with him outside the classroom and asked if there was anyone from the class that he wanted to accompany us. He told me that he didn’t have any friends and that it would be OK to come alone.

We went outside the classroom and sat on the floor. I asked him about getting on the table, about being angry, and about what had happened before his teacher gathered everyone on the carpet to read to them. He told me that he was using a coloured pencil when someone told him to give it to them. As he wasn’t finished, he said no. This person grabbed it from him, so Damien hit him. Then the other children started calling the teacher, telling her that Damien was hitting others. He was frightened that he was going to get in trouble so he got on the table and told everyone to get away or he’d kick them.

In this first of many conversations with Damien, I asked him why that situation was probably not a safe one. He could tell me right away that people could get hurt and that it wasn’t safe. He also told me how scared he was, how alone he felt, how unloved and uncared for he thought he was. He thought no one was going to listen to him and that he would be in trouble.

As Damien, his mother, the rest of his family, and I got to know each other better over the ensuing weeks; I discovered that he had been brutally sexually abused by his biological dad. He had also been physically abused by his much older brother. His mother worked 12 – 15 hours a day cleaning homes. If his grandmother was not able to take care of him before and after school, he was left in the care of the older brother who had previously beaten him. Mother had given up on accessing any support for fear that her children would be taken away from her.

All the same, Damien came to school every day well-groomed, well-fed, happy at the beginning of the day, excited about the potential that the school day held for him. Most days this lasted for a short period of time before I was called to come and support him while we tried to extricate him from some violent situation. Immediately after these situations, we would sit on the floor in the hallway outside of his classroom and talk. He would explain how he felt during the conflict and we began processing these conflicts with the other students involved. Through this, he began making friends and building relationships with others. Both he and those involved in the conflicts were willing to learn from what had happened and to forgive what had been seen as transgressions. As time went on, we would end our talks with a hug – no stiffening or tightness, but hugs into which Damien would melt. Sometimes he would cry, sometimes he would thank me.

During one of my last conversations with him, Damien talked about his father. He knew that I was aware of what had happened to him and what his father had done. After telling me that he knew I was aware of what his father had done, he told me that he still missed his father and that he still loved him “even though he was bad to me.” Then he asked me a question that I’ll never forget. He asked me “Is it OK that I miss him and that I still love him?”

So what does this have to do with spirit? What does it have to do with church? One of the readings we had yesterdays was from Mark 10. Verses 13 - 16.

People were bringing little children to him in order that he might touch them; and the disciples spoke sternly to them. But when Jesus saw this, he was indignant and said to them,

‘Let the little children come to me; do not stop them; for it is to such as these that the kingdom of God belongs. Truly I tell you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will never enter it.’

And he took them up in his arms, laid his hands on them, and blessed them.

Damien has such a huge capacity for forgiveness. Though so many of the people surrounding him had, in some way, betrayed him and his safety; he continued to love them. He continued to care about them. He was willing to trust others and to share his self with them. I find this amazing and a testament to the beautiful spirit within him.

Preaching? Not so much. Sharing Stories - More like it!

So, I have taken time to contemplate and realize that for me to preach is like me trying to be something I'm not. Now, my family members may disagree with me on this point, but I have to look more carefully at what I do well and who I am.

My goal of trying to demonstrate what we can learn from kids or their importance in a community is no different, but I can do this by sharing anecdotes from my experience. In telling anecdotes, I can share the passion that I feel about kids more genuinely. If I do otherwise I will spend my energy worrying about whether I am preaching well or keeping the attention of those who are listening.

I will also share some of these stories on this blog as we go along. Perhaps readers could provide feedback for me as to whether the anecdotes do their job.

Preaching

So what is preaching? The word has always had a slightly negative connotation to me. Yet I find myself in the situation where I am going to do some - as early as this Sunday. You might guess that I want to make this a positive experience - for those who listen, hear, or are present as well as for myself.

The topic for my foray into preaching will be "children in a faith community." The selections I chose for this week to support what I hope to say come from various sources. The first is from the Gospel of Mark. The second comes from The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran. The final, and very short one, is from Teilhard de Chardin. So I guess I go from traditional, to new age, to a former Catholic priest and philosopher. Who knew?

My point in what I want to say regards the importance children play in the community of a church or faith group. They are not simply there because their parents want to be part of the church. They are there to teach us, to model for us, to help us clarify who we are, and to integrate with us. They certainly are here to learn as well, but they give much more than they take.

I think that's what has been missing from our work in the past. We have seemed to tolerate kids, but they really haven't had much of an opportunity to share with us.

I need to contemplate this some more. Later....

Born again....why?

I was asked by someone at church to try to make the type bigger or change the background of this page. Apparently, the light type on black is difficult to read. Anyone else find this so? Is this any better?

Yesterday's scripture reading was about Nicodemus and his evening visit to Jesus where Nicodemus was told "no one can see the kingdom of God without being born from above."

We talked about Nicodemus' predicament and how he was basically being told that he would have to shed some of the ideas he had taken on if he wanted to freely experience God and the life that is thought of as the realm of God. There was his role on the council, his role as preserver of the faith and all its rules and restrictions, his role as member of the group who eventually condemned Christ to die.

As we then tried to make this somehow relevant for the kids that were there, it became really obvious that these people really didn't have much to change in their lives. Granted they find there are lots of pressures they face when it comes to being the best they can be, but mostly, they don't have a lot of bad habits. They don't have a lot of preconceived notions about people. They aren't involved in many negative behaviours - even though they certainly observe many and experience peer pressure to engage in some.

So the question might be: Why do they need to be "born from above" or as we have enjoyed expressing it in the latter part of the last century "Born Again?" Maybe the "born again" concept applies more relevantly to people my age or older.

I talked about my experiences in public education and how I worked hard to find acceptable ways to talk about spiritual matters with students. That I had to be very sensitive not to promote one religious experience over another. However, in my new position I have freedom to talk freely about religious beliefs. I shared with them that shedding some of the preconceived notions I had about ministry has been very liberating. That trying to avoid developing such strong opinions may keep them free to continue to grow. I am finding that at present.

At the same time, I don't want to promote the idea that one should ride the fence one's whole life. The middle of the road may be a comfortable place, but I rarely find it a place I want to stay for too long. Sticking one's stick in the sand is a good thing to do once in awhile. (Have I used enough cliches and hackneyed metaphors for one blog?)

In the end, we decided that continuing on our road to wine, that we would continue to do the things that help us be the best we can be. For many of the kids, this meant practicing their talents and making them stronger. As well, sharing their talents with others would help them be stronger in these talents. I really enjoyed listening to them and hearing them express what they could do.

Sanctuary

The committee that acts as an advisory group met last night. It was a time to get some feedback, look at what I'm doing and a time for them to look at and consider my literacy project.

This committee is comprised of the people who were on the search team that hired me for this position as well as the head of the committee in charge of staffing and hiring. They volunteer and we meet once a month. They are extremely dedicated to having the church succeed in meeting the needs of our church and the community it serves. They are also people with whom I have been acquainted for many years, with some of whom I have worked on behalf of the church and with some of whom I have sung in the choir.

I presented my proposal to them because, if they do not support the concept, I truly should question my involvement. They were extremely supportive and asked all the questions that need to be asked if this will ever get off the ground. In essence, it was their questions and the needs they identified that are the real support that this group gives. They helped identify the issues that will keep the project from being a success.

How wonderful it is to work in an environment like this! They look after the well-being, not only of the children and youth we serve, but of the personnel as well. I really feel blessed to be in this environment. I feel that I have been given an opportunity to continue "changing the world."

More as I continue working out the details of this new mission!

God?

I had the pleasure of having lunch with a close friend yesterday. We talked about God. She told me that what bothered her most were people who abdicate their responsibility and accountability in the name of God. She explained that when some of her friends accomplish something, they don't take credit but give it all to God - as a third party not truly integrated with them. When something fails, they also blame God. When they are less that who they can be, they blame God for not supporting them. When they are at their best, they credit God for leading them along the right path.

She also told me that when she is faced with a deep dilemma, she looks inside for guidance and answers. When she does so, she pictures her support network and thinks about the lessons they tried to give and the values they have transferred to her. She sees support from them as well as those who love her (her parents, her sister, cousins, special friends, etc.). She is happy to share the credit and blame with them, but she also says that she is ultimately responsible for the choices she makes and the decisions at which she arrives. She also talked about a scene from the last Harry Potter book where Harry calls upon his family, most of whom are dead, by using some special magic thing he has found. He calls upon them for help and guidance, for support and strength, for the loving energy he needs to accomplish a goal he has set for himself. She said that this was similar to how she looks inside herself to find answers.

I am so glad I listened more fully yesterday and was able to hear her. I shared that I still don't see what she related as being far from my understanding of God. Perhaps she limits this picture to her family and special friends, but I think of a wider sense of support. I think the first time someone shared the meaning of "Namaste" with me, it really clarified my developing understanding of God. The idea that "the divinity in me greets the divinity in you" helped me see God as an integral part of me that is there whether I recognize/acknowledge it or not. God is that divine energy in me that allows me, encourages me, sometimes even drives me to be the best I can be. God is the commonality among all those people my daughter pictures when she looks inside. It is when we are at our best that we provide the strength and guidance that she needs. It is God that helped us do that - not as a way for me to abdicate credit for this, but as a way to acknowledge that I am not alone in all of this. I love it and am proud of myself whenever I am able to accomplish my best. Thanking God is not a minimizing of this, but a celebration.

We also talked about how God and religion are not the same thing. Though religion is supposed to help us reconnect with the divinity that is part of us, it often falls short of that goal. When my friend told me about various incidents that distanced her continually from believing in God, she really related incidents of where religion failed to reconnect but actually increased the distance between her and a relationship with the divinity that is her. Most of these incidents were very hurtful - either to her or to someone for whom she cares deeply. She saw some of these as situations that COULD have been affirming and strengthening for friends, but wound up being situations where her friends became more dependent (or co-dependent) and less assertive.

How do we get the message out that God is not some third party judge that sits on a big marble throne in Washington DC and watches us and plays little games with us? I acknowledge that I once saw God this way. However, that was a long time ago. I would think it is time for us to grow up - even as children - to realize that this image of God might well have served a society that needed an external locus of control to get it to be accountable for everyone.

I want our society to grow up. I want us to realize that we have it within us to love and care for the entire creation and that we have the power to heal the earth, people, and all the rest of nature. For me, it is God that makes this all possible. Am I clear for anyone who reads this or is it still all completely fuzzy?

Post Election Blues

The day after the election and we discover that a little more than a third of the potential voters bothered to show up and vote. So much for my "responsibility" angle.

It is no wonder that modern depictions of Christ show him as someone who battled with disappointment and rejection. (I'm thinking particularly of Jesus Christ Superstar) If, as is my effort in this "Water to Wine" project, I actually get to where I feel like we have some sure fire strategies for feeling truly filled with the spirit, will I get as frustrated with people even try to do so? If we find ways that really nurture who we are as spiritual beings, share these with others, and they won't even try, will I feel rejected? Will the kids feel that way as well? Am I setting them up for feeling powerless? I sure hope not.

I guess that's where the "faith" angle comes in. Faith is what keeps us going in the face of adversity, rejection, disappointment, and powerless feelings. Perhaps that is my problem...my faith is weak.

I think that is what I felt when one of the kids, this past Sunday, talked about knowing that she wanted to be the best she can be, but that it was hard to be her best in the face of all the influences surrounding her. There's the peer pressure to conform. There are the images of beauty that are presented in various media. There are the acceptable behaviours being advocated in popular dramas and comedies. None of them truly advocate honesty, caring, generosity, non-violence, or nurture. None of them advocate acceptance of ourselves as we are. None seem to say, "Be you!" When honesty is advocated, it seems that it is the cruel honesty that identifies weakness in others rather than the gifts that shine through them. This cold, hard, honesty seems to be used to get others to conform to an image that may be foreign to the person who is getting the "honesty." It reminds me of the song "You gotta be..."

You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold
You gotta be wiser, you gotta be hard
You gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm
You gotta stay together

Ok, so it ends with "Love will save the day." All the same, why do we have to be hard, tough, stronger, cool, etc. in order to have love "save the day?" It seems like an oxymoron. Whilst being tough, hard, bold, cool, and stronger; am I also not building walls so thick that love can't possible enter to "save the day?"

I get a different message from my experiences. It is when I make myself vulnerable, when I open myself up to the ambiguous, when I try to see the infinite possibilities and uncertainty that I find truth, love, connection, and peace. Now there's an oxymoron: peaceful uncertainty.

Today must be one of those tired days. My faith is not strong. I'm not feeling very "bad."

Happy National Grouch Day!

Can you believe that they have a day for grouches? Apparently, today is the day. Though I am really tired, I do not feel grouchy today.

I'm actually feeling the opposite. I voted on my way in to work today-I had to stop and see a friend in order to wait until 10:00 AM when the polls opened. It was wonderful to be able to spend a little time with my friends, and I exercised my democratic responsibility as well.

Voting is such a privilege! I am amazed at how many people do not see that this privilege is also a responsibility. Often, when I was teaching in schools, students would tell me that their parents never voted. I didn't usually believe them. Then I started asking parents of my students. "Your son tells me that you never vote. I told him that he probably just didn't know when it was that you voted." Then they would actually confirm what their child had said.

• "Oh, I never vote."
• "My vote would never matter. My husband and I would just cancel each other out."
• "All politicians are the same. One is just as bad as another."
• "How would my vote ever matter?"
  
• "Politicians are all a bunch of crooks anyway."
  

and other such incredible statements.

If we don't vote, then we should never complain about what governments do! Maybe that's why I always vote - I like to feel free to complain! I'm pretty sure that isn't the reason I vote. I vote because I want to influence what governments do. This year, I spent some time with one particular candidate to see what that person's thoughts and values were regarding issues that are important to me. That time helped me make a decision about my vote.

When the Bible tells us that God gave us dominion over the world that was created, I don't think that we are being told to dominate nature. I really believe that the Bible is promoting our responsibility to be active and accountable for what happens in our world. We need to try to influence every aspect of what occurs around us to try to make it as good as it can be. We have a responsibility to work together to try to make our part of the world as good as it can be. Some take this further and try to use their influence to make things better where there is obviously a need for something to change. I have a harder time doing that because I am never sure what that change should be. If I start in my own locale, I think I have a better chance of "getting it right."

Being the "best we can be" means that we to be engaged in the world. In becoming wine, I want to be aware of issues that are influenced by my voting. I want to act locally in order that I might influence the global nature of our world.

I just went back through my writing to find out where I explained this "Water to Wine" project that is on-going here at Knox. I can find lots about it, but no explanations. So.....

The Water to Wine Project of Huda Hakawi
On September 23rd, the readings and sermon regarded the Wedding Feast at Cana where the first of Jesus' "miracles" occurred. The wedding that was attended by Jesus, many of the disciples, and his mother Mary, was three days along. (I was amazed that weddings were that long. They apparently continued for over a week!) They ran out of wine. This was a big deal considering the wedding wasn't even half over.

So Mary (remember how your mother was always trying to get you to show off?) looks to her son and tells him that the wine is gone. His response? "So what? This is not MY problem!" Does Mary listen? Of course not. She just tells the servants to do whatever her son tells them to do.

In spite of his effort to try to ignore and not get involved, Jesus tells the servants to take some huge earthen pots over to the well and fill them with water. He then tells one of the servants to take a dipper-full of water over to the wine steward.

Does Jesus make any magic sign over the water? No.
Does he say any special magic words over the wine? No.
Does he even say a prayer, touch the wine, look at the dipper? Nope. Nothing at all.

However, by the time the dipper gets to the wine steward, it contains some of the best wine the steward has ever tasted.

Jesus just used what was lying around. He didn't use "special" jugs. No "Special Well." No magic dipper. Just water from the well. Filled large jugs that were already nearby.

What I have learned from my colleagues here at the church is that "water" is often an analogy (in the Bible) for people. Water signifies people who are going along in their day-to-day existence, not doing anything particularly spiritual or righteous or holy. "Wine" is also an metaphor for our existence when we are "filled with the spirit." (No wonder they call alcohol-based beverages "spirits".)

As the kids and I were discussing this, we were pretty amazed at the idea that water could become wine so rapidly. We wondered if we could go from water to wine is such a short period of time.

Rather than try to do anything in a rush, we decided that we would make some wine and use the time it takes us to make wine to change ourselves from the "water" metaphor to "wine." So we used a wine kit and began on the 30th of September. You can go back on this site of the blog to see what we've been doing to get to where we want to be by the end of the project.

The Power of Prayer

This came to my email this morning. It is a neat story and a reminder of the power of prayer. I don't mean to say that we need to pray for "things" and know that they will come, but that when we pray for the benefit of others, we do a powerful thing.

Isaiah 65:24 "Before they call, I will answer."

This story was written by a doctor who worked in South Africa:

One night I had worked hard to help a mother in the labor ward; but in spite of all we could do, she died leaving us with a tiny premature baby and a crying two-year-old daughter. We would have difficulty keeping the baby alive, as we had no incubator (we had no electricity to run an incubator ).

We also had no special feeding facilities. Although we lived on the equator, nights were often chilly with treacherous drafts. One student midwife went for the box we had for such babies and the cotton wool that the baby would be wrapped in.

Another went to stoke up the fire and fill a hot water bottle. She came back shortly in distress to tell me that in filling the bottle, it had burst (rubber perishes easily in tropical climates). "And it is our last hot water bottle!" she exclaimed. As in the West, it is no good crying over spilled milk so in Central Africa it might be considered no good crying over burst water bottles They do not grow on trees, and there are no drugstores down forest pathways.

"All right," I said, "put the baby as near the fire as you safely can, and sleep between the baby and the door to keep it free from drafts. Your job is to keep the baby warm."

The following noon, as I did most days, I went to have prayers with any of the orphanage children who chose to gather with me. I gave the youngsters various suggestions of things to pray about and told them about the tiny baby. I explained our problem about keeping the baby warm enough, mentioning the hot water bottle, and that the baby could so easily die if it got chills. I also told them of the two-year-old sister, crying because her mother had died.

During prayer time, one ten-year old girl, Ruth, prayed with the usual blunt conciseness of our African children. "Please, God" she prayed, "send us a water bottle. It'll be no good tomorrow, God, as the baby will be de ad, so please send it this afternoon."

While I gasped inwardly at the audacity of the prayer, she added, "And while You are about it, would You please send a dolly for the little girl so she'll know You really love her?"

As often with children's prayers, I was put on the spot. Could I honestly say, "Amen". I just did not believe that God could do this. Oh, yes, I know that He can do everything, the Bible says so. But there are limits, aren't there? The only way God could answer this particular prayer would be by sending me a parcel from homeland. I had been in Africa for almost four years at that time, and I had never, ever received a parcel from home. Anyway, if anyone did send me a parcel, who would put in a hot water bottle? I lived on the equator!

Halfway through the afternoon, while I was teaching in the nurses' training school, a message was sent that there was a car at my front door.

By the time I reached home, the car had gone, but there, on the veranda, was a large twenty-two pound parcel. I felt tears pricking my eyes. I could not open the parcel alone, so I sent for the orphanage children.

Together we pulled off the string, carefully undoing each knot. We folded the paper, taking care not to tear it unduly. Excitement was mounting. Some thirty or forty pairs of eyes were focused on the large cardboard box. From the top, I lifted out brightly colored, knitted jerseys. Eyes sparkled as I gave them out. Then there were the knitted bandages for the leprosy patients, and the children looked a little bored. Then came a box of mixed raisins and sultanas - that would make a batch of buns for the weekend Then, as I put my hand in again, I felt the.....could it really be? I grasped it and pulled it out - yes, a brand-new, rubber hot water bottle. I cried. I had not asked God to send it; I had not truly believed that He could. Ruth was in the front row of the children. She rushed forward, crying out, "If God has sent the bottle, He must have sent the dolly too!"

Rummaging down to the bottom of the box, she pulled out the small, beautifully dressed dolly. Her eyes shone! She had never doubted!

Looking up at me, she asked: "Can I go over with you and give this dolly to that little girl, so she'll know that Jesus really loves her?"

That parcel had been on the way for five whole months. Packed up by my former Sunday school class, whose leader had heard and obeyed God's prompting to send a hot water bottle, even to the equator. And one of the girls had put in a dolly for an African child - five months before, in answer to the believing prayer of a ten-year-old to bring it "that afternoon."

"Before they call, I will answer" (Isaiah 65:24) This awesome prayer takes less than a minute. When you receive this, say the prayer, that's all you have to do. No strings attached. Just send it on to whomever you want - but do send it on. Prayer is one of the best free gifts we receive. There is no cost but a lot of rewards.

Let's continue praying for one another:

Loving God, I ask you to bless my friends reading this right now. I am asking You to minister to their spirit at this very moment. Where there is pain, give them Your peace and mercy. Where there is self doubting, release a renewed confidence to work through them. Where there is spiritual stagnation, I ask You to renew them by revealing Your nearness, and by drawing them into greater intimacy with You. Where there is fear, reveal Your love, and release to them Your courage. Bless their finances, give them greater vision, and raise up leaders and friends to support and encourage them. Give each of them discernment to recognize the evil forces around them, and reveal to them the power they have in You to defeat it. I ask you to do these things in Jesus' name.

P.S. Passing this on to anyone you consider a friend will bless you both. Passing this on to one not considered a friend is something Christ would do.

"Do not ask the Lord to guide your footsteps if you're not willing to move your feet."